Happy birthday, Melania!
We hope you like the flowers (yawn) and card (oh brother) your husband got you for the big 48 today.
Too bad the President “did not have time” to get you an actual present, as he claimed during a “Fox and Friends” interview Thursday morning.
Here are five gifts we think you would have loved.
1) A fly swatter
You can use it to extend your reach for slapping away 45’s hand when he tries to hold yours.
2) A weighted blanket
Maybe you know about these — maybe you have one. Maybe you have dresses made from them. But it’s exactly what it sounds like. The pressure of these spreads, is said to be therapeutic and mimics the pressure of being hugged. There are pretty ones at Etsy.
3) An island
Back in December you said that your idea of a dream getaway is on a deserted island.” There’s a bunch at privateislandsonline.com. Tip: Don’t go during Stormy weather.
4) A hat rack — a big one
You know why.
5) Dinner reservations to 11 Madison Park
Located at the corner of 24th St., it was named the best restaurant in the world last year. Trump is happy with Big Macs, but you deserve a gourmet break today.
Table for 1. Unless you wear that white hat — then for 2.
With Ariel Scotti
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